Jacqui Kuhn

Gewoonlik as ek 'n program aanbied is ek 'n paar uur voor die tyd by die lokaal omdat dit 'n hele rukkie neem om die tegniese infrakstruktuur reg te kry sodat ek my beste kan lewer.

Terwyl ons besig was het 'n dame haar tafel gedek vir die geleentheid. Die vrou het my opgeval as sterk en in beheer, en dat sy presies weet wat sy wil hê. . Ek vind toe uit dat sy die dame is vir wie ek erkenning gaan gee - en toe verstaan ek....

Sy is 'n fenominale vrou en sy het 'n verhaal wat sy self gaan vertel omdat ek gedink het sy sal dit die heel beste kan vertel. So hier is haar storie.

Sy skryf dit in Engels:

"I was also one of those women that thought I could never manage without my husband. But my marriage was not of the best, so I divorced my husband when my son was four.
I never got any financial support from him for my son as his new wife would not let him pay - so I told him to not be bothered by us any longer, we would be fine without his support. We never heard from him again.

My son and I got our lives together by me joining the South African Defence Force to help me financially. It went well and I even bought a house.
There was a robbery in my office and I had to get the police out. The one police man took a liking to me, but I did not respond.
I then left the army to open up a business, and then realized that this police man was starting to haunt me - and he was a married man.
I never returned his calls and did not respond to the gifts he showered on me. I sold the one buisness and bought a coffee shop from a family member.

At this stage I had to phone the police to escourt me home from the shop as this man was getting a nuisance.
My home had all the necessary safety precautions and on this specific Friday evening my son went out and left the back door open for my dog to come in and out. The next moment this police man was in my living room and he was very drunk. He pinned me down on the couch and raped me. He said "Maybe now you will marry me"

The next 3 months was hell, as I kept it a secret and I also suspected that I might be pregnant. A sister I knew, confirmed my worst nightmare and it felt like the end of the world to me. How was I ever going to tell my son - and I was a Sunday-school teacher.
I told my staff members as I felt they had to know why I was not myself for the past few months and I told my son. He wanted to kill the man.
I never considered an abortion but planned to have the baby adopted.
The Welfare helped me find a couple in Pretoria. Nobody new - not even the doctor I went to.
He could pick up that I felt no love or interest for this unborn baby and he asked me why I am not excitied about the new baby. My reply was that I already have a child and this one is nothing new.

On the 18th of April 2000 I had an emergency caeser and I insisted not te see the baby and not to breastfeed it.
The sister insisted that I breastfeed- she did not know the background.

I went home and found that my son had sold his motorbike to buy baby stuff for his little brother and wanted me to keep the baby.
I told him that his adoption parents were coming to fecth him anyway. We were not on good speaking terms with each other. The following day I got a phone call from the babies new mother to be and she was not very nice. My son overheard the conversation and was very upset.
Even my brother paid me a visit to say that he would rather adopt my baby as I could not give it to strangers.

I then decided to keep my baby and luckily he did not look anything like the father.
Then the fathers's wife crept out of the woodwork harrassing me to have blood tests done to prove that he is not the father of my baby and that he did not rape me.
The tests proved the truth and the court ruled in my favour for them not to come near me and my sons and for them to pay maintenance.
Otherwise I would take the case further and slate them completely.

Another challenge came my way - I lost the shop when my baby was 8 months as the contract I sighned was illegal and the family member tricked me into buying a shop that was bankrupt. I also lost all the money I put down for the shop and had nothing to make a living for me and my two sons.

I had to plan. I rented my house and moved to a one bedroom flat on a plot which was not very nice but I had to make it work. I put my house on the market. I found a job that payed a R1 000. I had to sell my car. I saw a red little car for R4 000. The gentleman who bought my car added R4 000 and told me to buy the car.

I applied for a better job and worked for the company for three years. I could then afford a two bedroom flat in town. Later I moved into a town house and could buy a better car for us.

Today my wonderful older son is married with a four year old child. We are happy because we have each other. I am proud of my son as he helped me to make the right decisions and always supported me.

My baby is a healthy little 8 year old blond boy.

I know that one day I will have to tell him the truth - cause the truth and confronting the truth sets us free and heals us.
But I will know what to say and what to tell him.........."

Jacqui jy is 'n fenominale vrou wat die lewe konfronteer en nie gaan lê nie. Die terugslae het van jou 'n sterker wyser vrou gemaak by wie baie van ons kan leer. Dankie daarvoor.

"Your heart is full of tenderness and mercy, I trust that you will always remember that!!